Thanksgiving of 1622, the Pilgrims third November (second year) in their new land took place in desperate circumstances. Failed crops, unexpected new settlers and debt to those who brought them here in November 1620, left them near starvation.

"At one point, a daily ration of food for a Pilgrim was 5 kernels of corn. With a simple faith that God would sustain them, no matter what, they pulled through. History records that not a single one of them died from starvation that winter. Not a one!"  And they gave thanks!

At the same time, in care ministry, we know that mistaken efforts or directions to give thanks can can cause damage.  By wrongly saying things like, "We are thankful their suffering is over," or "You can be thankful for the time you had with them" are mistaken uses of thankfulness . Such insensitive statements have often been spoken with good intentions but poor judgment.

Yet even within the most painful circumstances, a skilled and careful use of thankfulness can be a healthy moment of relief, happiness or comfort.

FOR SELF CARE AS YOU ARE CONTINUALLY CARING FOR PEOPLE IN DESPERATE CIRCUMSTANCES

As care givers part of our self care is to cultivate an attitude and expression of thankfulness even when we see suffering, grief, sickness, poverty, addiction and many other needs every week. We can be...

• Thankful for the sacred honor of being present with people in their times of need.
• Thankful for the pain of grief that reveals love, relationship and the value of loved ones lost.
• Thankful for outrage because a nation still cares when tragedies harm the innocent.
• Thankful for the compassion of professionals, first responders, volunteers, friends, neighbors, brothers and sisters in the faith who run toward the pain to assist and/or be present with those suffering. 
• Thankful for a faith in a Suffering Savior because in the words of Dietrich Bonhoeffer, "Only a suffering God can help."

FOR THOSE IN ACUTE GRIEF
I cared for a family as they were in the shock of the premature loss of their wife and mother. They expressed appreciation to me for my presence in that time. There gratitude was greater than I expected or deserved or even wanted.  It would have been understandable if they cound not must the energy to be thankful, and I was not there to be appreciated. But it was good that they could because the recognition of any blessing, even that someone cared for them, and expressing thanks was medicine to their soul. Moments of thankfulness to the doctor, nurse or CNA for medical care, the chaplain, pastor or friend for loving support, and for a time to be thankful for the life of the one who died can interrupt episodes of weeping and provide an oasis of relief.

FOR A SAD NATION
As we begin the holiday season, the emotions of our nation are again struggling to find comfort because of a recent shooting and stabbinG.  In the delicate balance of recognizing and allowing for the anger and grief and avoiding the unwise expressions of thanks, a healthy expression of thankfulness, even if just for a moment, can be a recess from the pain of suffering and, hopefully, open the window to God's presence and healing.

Being thankful and helping people express thanks is important.

I am thankful for you and your commitment to care for people and I hope this post will help you to care better than ever.